In dating advice today, women are often told to date more than one guy at a time as a way to prevent getting too attached to any one guy until he gets attached to her. Today, with birth control, sex and babies may not be as tightly connected but our brains are still wired the same as 1000 years ago.
Because I have heard guys in the manosphere say so over and over again. A high quality guy who finds out you have several other irons in the fire is more likely to move on than engage in some silly bidding war for your affection. However, men say the reverse is not true for women. If he’s OK with you dating (and especially sleeping with) other guys while you are dating (and/or sleeping with) him, he’s already determined he will not commit to you — ever. Plus, if you are busy with other guys, that gives him time to seek out other women! Seven, there’s a reason there is historical precedence of a man having more than one wife, but there is not the reverse. Because while a man can reproduce simultaneously with as many women (and their wombs) as he can manage, women can only be pregnant with one child at a time, so there is no biological advantage for him of you having more than one mate.
After a lot of dates with a lot ofwomen, I noticed two things: #1: It takes a special set of skills and insights to pass a woman’s tests and graduate from first-dater to “boyfriend material,” the kind of man she wants to share fulfilling, long-term intimacy with.
#2: The longer I continued to fail these tests, the more I started to feel like something wonderful was missing from my life — also known as having a great GIRLFRIEND.
But when it comes to whether she’ll see you as boyfriend material, thoughtfulness takes on a whole other meaning.
It’s your ability to pay attention to her in unexpected ways — at unexpected times — because it’s genuinely in your heart to do it.
However, this is not something I have ever done before and I am having a hard time with the idea of juggling.
Making a decision about a guy is no different than any other decision.
You weigh your pros and cons, you do your cost-benefit analysis, you use a little logic and a little emotion, and then make a largely arbitrary choice without knowing if you’re right.
Ever hear the old adage, "date three to find the one"? The simple premise—date three men at once to increase your chances of finding the man you'll marry—was something my grandmother swore by (funny, considering I doubt she dated anyone besides my grandfather.
Ever.)But there may be wisdom in these wise, old words.